The Best Oscar acceptance speech ever

Thank you and thank you again, please sit down your to kind

I brought here a list, look here it is

You know just in a case I had to thank someone, and I don’t wanna forget nobody, so Let’s do this fast, first off all the foreign associated press thanks for having me here,I don’t know who or what you are or why the fuck I should thank you,but I was told, If you are up there ,you start with that ,so thanks

What ? why the booing , why do you boo me ,is it the word fuck? don’t worry they beep that out ,we not live anymore thanks to Mr Smith we are on a two minutes delay here, oh you think the associated press will not choose me anymore or support me after this?

I don’t care. I have my Oscar, and I worked hard for that ,You know before I did this movie , I lived in my car could not pay a rent , could not pay something decent to eat , I eat from the fucking the trash cans, and you know at that time ,nobody came up me to me and said ,Listen I am from the foreign associated press and I am here to help you, because if that would happen

I would be here on my fucking knees and and screaming and praising the foreign associated press

But that didn’t happen , I did it all alone ,with my determination and hard work , so if there is anybody I should thank, its me , its fucking me

Enough with the fuck word? nooo I’m not ready yet, stop that fucking music

I want to finisch this and then I am gone,gone from this fake world,

why you look like that at me ?don’t like what you hear?

I am like you ,we are the same, sitting here pretending to have a good night showing us self of to the poor people out there, you want my Oscar back ?

then I fucking dare you right now, get out of your seat walk out, go outside find a homeless person ,and tell him or her, I am a wealthy nobody ,but dont worry I am here to help you, if you do that , I will give you my fucking Oscar right now!

I don’t see anybody moving? I don’t see anybody getting up?

No I thought so , you can not relate to the real world ,you know there is a real world out there? again with the fucking music, stop with that,……

You know I will please you,and leave you all alone, but before that ,you know that your money what all of you mother fuckers make in just one year

can feed and house the homeless peopele here in our great fucking country for years NO for decades

You want me to go now? Did I spoil your evening? well I dont give a fuck

I have my fucking Oscar and I made my self a promise, that if I would win this meaningless award I would invite all my friends so guys lets open the doors , and let them in

My dear friends meet Hollywood

Hollywood meet my dear friends from the streets

Thank you and good night

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